Pilot’s Unaired Lines
Rivers’ Fashion Report: Week 1
Michael Bluth Named New President
George Bluth, Sr. Arrested
Episode Transcript
Written by Mitchell Hurwitz.
G.O.B.: Are those police boats?
G.O.B.: No, I’m serious. I think they are police boats.
Man: (On bullhorn.) Prepare to be boarded. Prepare to be boarded.
George Michael: I knew it was against the law.
George, Sr.: That’s the Securities and Exchange Commission.
Buster: They have boats?
George, Sr.: Give me a cell phone.
Lucille: Lindsay, Buster, up to the bridge! Come on, Buster. Mighty good grief!
- gaffe
- George, Sr. is heard instructing his assistant Delores on which documents to shred. However, we learn in Visiting Ours that his fiercely loyal assistant is Kitty.
George, Sr.: Delores, listen to me.
Lucille: Out of my way!
George, Sr.: Empty the accounts.
Lucille: Out of my way, Celeste!
George, Sr.: Why are you crying? Why are you crying?
Lucille: Out of my way. Out, out, out. Lindsay, take the wheel. Buster, find us a channel to the ocean.
Buster: Gee, I don’t really have any of my mapping equipment with me.
Lindsay: You’ve had $80,000 worth of cartography lessons. Get us a channel to the ocean.
Buster: Okay, okay, okay.
- cell phone
- George, Sr. says “Can you hear me now?” which is a tagline for Verizon’s advertisements.
George, Sr.: Can you hear me now?
Buster: Obviously this blue part here is the land... and that would mean...
Lindsay: Oh, Buster, Buster, it’s all right.
George, Sr.: Shredder. No, save it. Save it. Shredder.
Lucille: Please, don’t leave us now, Buster, please!
G.O.B.: Get in the tomb.
George, Sr.: Save it.
G.O.B.: The Aztec Tomb.
George, Sr.: Hold on. I don’t have time for your magic tricks.
G.O.B.: Illusions, Dad. You don’t have time for my illusions.
George, Sr.: What is wrong with you? (Muffled.) Why are you so angry?
G.O.B.: Look, just stay in the box. I’ll make you disappear.
Narrator: The Bluth family dominated the news that night.
John Beard: Bluth Development Company president George Bluth was arrested tonight for defrauding investors, and using the company as his personal piggy bank.
John Beard: More intrigue on the high seas tonight, as dozens of local pirates were arrested for protesting the Yacht Club’s discriminatory policies.
Narrator: Even Michael’s brother G.O.B. made the news.
Trisha Thoon: It was Mr. Bluth’s son “Gob,” a part-time magician, who hid his father here, in The Aztec Tomb. By pushing on this pivoting panel...
