Episode Transcript
Written by Richard Rosenstock and John Levenstein.
George, Sr.: (Softly.) No batter... no batter. No batter...
Narrator: I’m sure your grandfather was just kidding around. You know that’s his sense of humor.
George Michael: I know, I know. Yeah. I don’t... I don’t totally get the hair joke, but I’m fine, Dad.
Michael: Are you sure?
George Michael: Yeah.
Michael: I am going to head back in though, okay? I’ll see if Pop-Pop’s got any more zingers. Why don’t you just stay out here and relax, pal, okay? Watch the softball game.
George Michael: Okay.
Michael: I’ll be right back.
Guard: Hey! Stop! Stop!
Siren wailing. Man runs up and over the staircar’s stairs.
George Michael: Dad?
George, Sr.: I don’t like prison anymore.
Michael: That’s why I’m trying to get you out of here.
George, Sr.: I don’t know. Maybe I’ve been in denial, but this place is breaking me, Mikey. I’m alone here but for you.
Michael: Come on. You got me, you got Mom.
George, Sr.: Your mother’s never shown her face.
Michael: Whoa! She’s never been here? You should have heard the grief she gave me when I said I’d never show up again.
George, Sr.: You said... you said what?
Michael: Dad, come on. You don’t need me. You’re playing softball all the time.
George, Sr.: I do need you, Michael. No more softball.
Michael: This is nuts, you know? You’re her husband. The least she can do is come out and visit you, right?
George, Sr.: God, you know your mom. This isn’t her crowd. She’s very easily threatened. You remember the carjacker?
Lucille maces an orange vendor. He screams.
Michael: Well, she’s certainly toughened up since then. You know, she’s eating lunch by the pool now.
George, Sr.: Well, there’s a big difference between the country club pool and the conjugal trailer.
Michael: That’s not what I meant when I said visiting.
George, Sr.: That’s too bad, because I really miss that personal contact. It was the one thing that calmed me when I got stressed. It just felt humanizing.
Narrator: Michael, for the first time, saw his father as a vulnerable human being.
George, Sr.: Daddy horny, Michael.
I haven’t had sex in a month.
Michael: You know, you’ve been here two months.
George, Sr.: It’s hard to gauge time.
Michael: Yeah. I’ll bet.
Lucille: (Belching.) Ooh! Sorry, Michael. Pool food. My system’s not used to curly fries.
Michael: How can you ignore that man? You know, he’s having a hard time in there. He’s lonely.
Lucille: That’s what his children are for.
Michael: Yeah? Well, you know, there are certain things that he can’t get from his children.
Lucille: If you’re going to say pride, Michael, you’re wrong. He is proud of his children.
Michael: I wasn’t going to say pride, Mom. Uh... listen. I... I... I think that... I think that you should... Oh, I can’t believe I’m going to say this. I think that you should visit him in an intimate... marital... trailer.
Lucille: Are you mad?
Michael: You think I’m comfortable asking you to do this? I mean, he needs you, Mom.
