The Magical Arrested Development Tour, Part II
Episode Transcript
Written by Jim Vallely and John Levenstein.
Narrator: George Michael, meanwhile, was at the frozen banana stand when he thought he spotted a familiar face.
George Michael: Pop-Pop? Oh, sorry, Miss. Pop-Pop?
Maeby: You think you saw Pop-Pop?
George Michael: But with hair. Which is probably why he asked for my hair, remember?
George, Sr.: Give Pop-Pop your hair! Give me the hair!
Maeby: It all adds up. He stole somebody’s hair, made a wig, knocked out the guard, tunneled his way through a sewer line and stopped to get a candy apple on his way to Mexico.
George Michael: Of course! You’re mocking me.
Maeby: Of course.
George Michael: I know what I saw, Maeby, and there’s no other explanation.
George, Sr.: So, listen, my twin brother’s in town. I want you to take care of him.
Michael: You still see Uncle Oscar?
George, Sr.: Tell you what. Give him ten grand from the new cash, just send him on his way.
Michael: Dad, the money is for the business, okay? I’m not just going to hand it all out.
George, Sr.: Michael, this is my brother. Do you know what it’s like to have a sibling who has no source of income except for you?
Michael: Just one? No, no idea. It sounds wonderful, though.
Michael: Look, the board is watching every move I make, especially that guy Jordan. He’s just waiting for me to screw up so he can blow the whistle on me.
George, Sr.: Why don’t you just buy him out of his stock?
Michael: No, no, he wants twice the value. Listen, stop telling me what to do with the money, please. I’ve got a plan for the board meeting that’s going to take the gun right out of Jordan’s hand.
Mr. Jordan: Listen, you’ve got the money now and you know my price. You don’t need a whistle blower around here.
Michael: Interesting choice of words, Mr. Jordan. He’s right, we don’t need a whistle blower. We need a building full of whistle blowers. Okay? Whistles. I want this place to be honest. That’s exactly why I had these made up for us. When you see something wrong...
Michael: There you go. I want you to report it. I want you to...
Michael: Exactly. Just like that. I want us to police ourselves vigilantly... Let’s wait till something’s actually happens, though.
Michael: All right... Good fun... Enough!
Michael: 45, 46, 47...
Michael: Okay, there’s still three whistles left out there. Who’s got the whistles?
Board Member #1: He kept one.
Michael: There’s a good example of whistle blowing, okay, but you’ve kept yours, so it’s hurting your case.
Board Member #1: I was in the bathroom when you asked for it back.
Board Member #2: No, he wasn’t.
Michael: In any event, we are going to be responsible with this money.
Tobias: Michael, I hope I’m not interrupting anything, but I’d love to get a hunk of that new company money.
Whistle blows.
