The Magical Arrested Development Tour, Part II
Bend It Like Buster
missin kittykat
Episode Transcript
Written by Mitchell Hurwitz and Richard Rosenstock.
George Michael: What are we getting? Is it something for a magic trick?
G.O.B.: In a way.
George Michael: You know, it’s so great to be hanging out with you. There are certain things that I can talk to you about that I can’t really with my dad, like, uh... were-were you ever awkward around girls?
G.O.B.: What do you mean? Like if there were three of us and I didn’t know where to start? No, I think I did pretty well. Not a lot of complaints, if you know what I mean. At least not from the girl.
George Michael: You’re saying I should just be myself?
G.O.B.: And he had to drive her home, so I think I did pretty good. Pretty damn good.
G.O.B.: Hey, guy, how many mice will $13 buy?
Sign says rats are $2.50 each.
Narrator: And at the prison, George Sr. had a surprise visitor.
Buster: Just wanted to check in and make sure you’re aware that your ban on organized sports in this family has been violated.
George, Sr.: Ban on organized sports?
Buster: You know, how you wouldn’t let me sign up for anything when I was a kid.
George, Sr.: Is that what you’ve been thinking all these years? No, no, look, you were... you were just a turd out there, you know? You couldn’t kick, and you couldn’t run, you know? You were just a turd.
Buster: Prison has destroyed the way you talk. If that’s what it takes to impress these guys around here, then they are not your friends.
Buster: Anyway, Annyong’s playing soccer, but I guess I should just ignore it, look the other way as Mom and Uncle Oscar and Annyong have a perfect little family...
George, Sr.: Whoa, whoa whoa. Oscar? My brother Oscar? Oscar’s been coming around?
Guard's Daughter: No touching!
George, Sr.: No touching. No touching.
Buster: I will do it, Dad.
George, Sr.: Good. Put her there.
Narrator: And Michael arrived at the police station with Maeby.
Barry: I got here as quickly as I could.
Michael: I didn’t know you had a daughter.
Barry: I don’t.
Barry's Girlfriend: I thought you wanted me to call you “Daddy.”
Barry: Why don’t you wait for Daddy in the car?
Barry: All right. What do we have here?
Michael: G.O.B. sunk the yacht. Last time Kitty was seen, she was getting onto it. It’s on tape.
Barry: Ooh! Did you see this?
Maeby: Yup.
Barry: Ooh! Chills. Why do I keep getting these bruises?
Michael: Barry.
Barry: Okay.
Michael: No. What are you talking— we don’t lie in this family. Maeby, why don’t you get a soda?
Narrator: Meanwhile, Lindsay was at work, and starting to get jealous that her daughter was at work with Michael.
Lindsay: (Into phone.) Hello Michael. I know you think I’m such a horrible mother, but I was just seeing how my daughter was doing at work.
Michael: Uh, she’s, um... She’s making lots of friends already. (To Barry.) Will you help me there, please?
Narrator: It was at this moment that G.O.B. and George Michael arrived at the store.
George Michael: You know, say what you will about America. 13 bucks still gets you a hell of a lot of mice.
