Written by Chuck Martin and Lisa Parsons.
Narrator: And so lunch continued with both Bluth boys trying to prove they weren’t interested in the women they were interested in.
Sally Sitwell: You know, when I saw those golf carts, it kind of brought back some memories.
Michael: Did you have too much club sauce on your calamari?
Lucille 2: G.O.B., read me the desserts.
G.O.B.: She... probably forgot her old-lady glasses.
Lucille 2: What is the matter with you, Goby?
Stan Sitwell: I’m happy to read to the lovely lady. “An assortment of ice creams and sorbets.”
Michael: You all right with him reading to your girl?
G.O.B.: Not my girl. Why don’t you read to your girl?
Michael: Well, I... Come on, I don’t have a girl. (To waiter.) No, thanks, already taken care of. Thank you. Thanks.
Waiter #3: I’m sorry. Apparently, there’s been some increased activity on your card.
(Whispering.) It’s been declined.Narrator: In fact, the increased activity on Michael’s card was his father’s.
Worker #4: Do you really think a hot tub is the best thing for someone with your condition?
George, Sr.: I can’t see, but, uh, I didn’t know there was a doctor installing this.
Steve Holt: Someone order a case of Bag-N-Boil frozen dinners?
Stan Sitwell: I’m happy to get this, Michael.
Michael: No, no, no, please. Stan, I-I’ll do it. (To waiter.) Um... can you put this on my mother’s card?
Waiter #3: Your mother? No, no, no, no. She is a pool member only. And you’ll excuse me if my tone is not polite, but this is more polite than she has ever talked to me.
Narrator: Michael had a feeling why his credit card had been rejected.
George, Sr.: (Moaning.)
Michael: What the hell did you do?
George, Sr.: I overdid it. Oh, it’s so hot.
Narrator: Michael’s father had just installed a hot tub in the attic.
Michael: What happened to you?
George, Sr.: I tried to drink some of the water, and it was too hot and it tasted like soy sauce. I think the teriyaki chicken burst.
Michael: That’s why people typically don’t cook in these, or install them in attics.
George, Sr.: You gotta get it out of here, Mikey. My eyes... they’re burning.
Michael: Want to thank you for charging it to my credit card. You made me look very foolish in front of Sally Sitwell.
George, Sr.: Did you stick it to her?
Michael: No, I didn’t. You screwed that up, just like you screwed up this hot tub. Is that a Veal Marsala stuck in the intake?
George, Sr.: They all looked so good on the boxes, You know it... it’s good you backed off Sally. I don’t need that guy saying his daughter’s sticking it to my loser son.
Michael: You know something? The reason that I never went after her is because you were always pushing me, but now that I know that I don’t have your approval, I-I think that, uh, I think that I’ll finally go for it.
George, Sr.: This isn’t turning into the party hang out I hoped.
Michael: Hey.
George Michael: Hey. I thought I heard something before, like a wolf drowning or something.
Michael: I think that that was maybe the house settling. Speaking of settling, how’s Ann?
Michael: I mean, have you settled on an artist’s work to burn?
George Michael: Well, I was thinking Eminem for awhile.
Michael: Sure.
George Michael: But, you know, everyone’s gonna be burning Eminem, so, you know. Then I got this Pat Boone album, but the guy’s Christian. But, you know, I don’t know, somebody’s gotta burn, right?
Michael: Well, I guess.
