Episode Transcript
Written by Jim Vallely and Mitchell Hurwitz.
Lucille: Oh, he’ll know when we bring home the trophy.
George Michael: Yeah, but... maybe I’ll just give him a call.
Hotel Clerk: And what name should we put the room under?
Lucille: Karmopolis.
Narrator: And Lindsay was about to see a Tobias with the raw power of George, Sr.
Lindsay: Tobias, I still do sort of want to talk to you about some things.
Tobias: It’s a little late for talk, Lindsay. I’m a man of action now. (Grunts.) (Drops jar into trash.) You don’t need the calories. (Whispering.) This isn’t working.
Lindsay: Is it my imagination, or is he more commanding and-and mannish? It’s, like, I don’t know, maybe I do want to be with him.
Maeby: Then you should go to him. For as it is written, you shall be with whom you have formed a more perfect union with under God.
Lindsay: She’s right.
Maeby: (Softly.) This isn’t working.
Hotel Clerk: I’m sorry, you’ve got the wrong Motherboy.
Michael: Yeah, this looks like the place.
Narrator: And Michael and Buster arrived at Motherboy.
Michael: Excuse me. Has a Lucille Bluth checked in?
Hotel Clerk: I have no one by that name.
Buster: God, she knows you’re after her.
Michael: She does?
Buster: Wait a minute. I recognize those outfits. We’re getting you out of here!
Boy Sailor: Thank you, thank you!
Buster: Oh, God! It’s red.
Boy Sailor: Take me with you! No, please, please!
Buster: It was the wrong child.
Michael: Where do we go next?
Buster: I will tell you this, Michael: if Mother saw those two, she is going to change clothes, and that means he’ll be on the balcony. Whenever she changed clothes, she made me wait on the balcony until zip-up. And yet anything goes at bath time.
Michael: Let’s check the balconies.
Narrator: And Barry prepared G.O.B. to meet with his wife.
Barry: If you really want to settle this, then your job is to convince that “wife” of yours that you are willing to go in front of the judge and admit that you never had sex.
G.O.B.: She has a name, Barry. You don’t happen to know when it is, by the way, do you?
Barry: That’s why I want to settle. I’m not “super-prepared.”
G.O.B.: But if you think it’ll scare her off...
Barry: I do, and it will.
Narrator: And soon, Michael and Buster surveyed the hotel, looking for George Michael.
Buster: I have an idea. It is time I used something I trained for in Army, but I never got a chance to do.
Michael: Buster, you can’t zip-line over there.
