Episode Transcript
Written by Jim Vallely and Mitchell Hurwitz.
Narrator: And George Michael tried to break up with Ann.
George Michael: I-I can’t go out tomorrow night, ’cause there’s this movie premiere. It’s kind of racy, but...
Ann 2.0: Oh, the cousin one. Yeah, I can’t believe it. I was just going to ask you to go.
George Michael: Really? You want to see that?
Ann 2.0: No, I want to get the whole gang from the church group together. We’re going to picket those bastards.
Narrator: George Michael had only heard Ann swear once before, when he’d joined some of her youth group to protest the home of Marc Cherry, executive producer of the hit show, Desperate Housewives.
Marc Cherry: It’s a satire!
Ann 2.0: He saw us! The bastard saw us!
Narrator: And the promise of another kiss was too enticing to turn down.
George Michael: Yeah, okay. The bastards...
Narrator: Oscar, meanwhile, checked in on Buster.
Narrator: Lucille, meanwhile, was on the phone with Michael.
Michael: They’re keeping me overnight while I wait for my arraignment, I’d appreciate it if you could tell my son that I’m on a business trip.
Buster: You lied to me! You said my father was my father, but my uncle is my father... My father is my uncle!
Narrator: It was at that moment that the guards played a CD they’d recently confiscated.
G.O.B.: (Singing as Franklin.) Now I’ve got a special thank you for a brother who made this happen.
Michael: Is that Franklin?
G.O.B.: (Singing off key.) / Yeah, I would fight for you / I’d lie for you / Walk the wire for you / Yeah, I’d die for you /
Narrator: And Michael realized that he could never turn his brother in. G.O.B., meanwhile, was having a similar epiphany.
G.O.B.: (Singing.) / I do it for you. / (Into phone.) Barry, it’s G.O.B. Tell Michael not to testify. I’m bringing in Dad.
G.O.B.: Franklin!
G.O.B.: (In British accent as Franklin.) You’ve ruined the act, G.O.B.
Narrator: And Lucille confronted Oscar.
Lucille: You told him you were his father?!
Oscar: I did no such thing.
Lucille: You’re high!
