Episode Transcript
Written by Tom Saunders.
Maeby: I gave him a roofie. A girl’s got to grow up sometime.
George Michael: He’s your cousin.
Maeby: My cousin?
George Michael: I should have told you that. Now you’ve drugged him and had your way with him. How is that even possible?
Maeby: No, George Michael, we didn’t do anything. I just wanted him to think we did. Don’t you see? I drugged him not to go all the way with him.
George Michael: Well, I think even the anti-drug people are going to be okay with that.
Maeby: Well, let’s get his pants back on.
George Michael: You took his pants off?
Narrator: And Michael tried to salvage the remains of the files from the car fire.
Lindsay: You call the attorney?
Michael: Yeah, I sure did, but he’s not taking our calls because apparently the retainer’s all used up.
Lindsay: He took my call. He’s very good.
Michael: Yeah, that’s how the retainer got eaten up, okay? The secretary took it all down here on the transcript.
Lindsay: She’s very good, too.
Michael: I’m not paying for this.
G.O.B.: Speaking to me yet?
Michael: It’s only been an hour. You know, here, here’s what I don’t understand. What were you guys doing with Rita in the first place?
G.O.B.: We just wanted to do something nice for you, Michael, because you do so much for us. I guess we screwed it up.
Michael: Well I screwed it up because I was trying to impress her and let’s face it, she’s probably too good for me.
G.O.B.: No. What you need to do is go to her and ask for another chance. She’d be lucky to have you, Michael.
Michael: Thanks, G.O.B. Sometimes you do surprise me.
G.O.B.: I’ve got one more surprise for you. (As Franklin.) / It ain’t easy being whi... /
Narrator: And Michael did try again with Rita, but this time, determined to keep no secrets.
Michael: I, uh, I want to tell you everything if, if you’re willing to listen.
Rita: I’m a very good listener.
Michael: Great. We’ll start with the misdemeanors and then we’re going to push right on through to the lighter treasons. So, 1983, uh...
but Michael Bluth will return in “Notapusy”
Narrator: On the next Arrested Development, Lindsay tries to work off her debt with Bob Loblaw...
Lindsay: I’m willing to debase myself.
Bob Loblaw: Get a maid’s uniform and come by my house around 7:00.
Lindsay: The is no way to misinterpret that.
Narrator: Except the one. ... and a traumatized Steve Holt needs a father.
Steve Holt: I’ve made a huge mistake.
G.O.B.: I know the feeling. I had you. I’m your father, Steve Holt! I can’t hide from it anymore.
Steve Holt: I won’t forget this... Dad.
G.O.B.: (Popping Roofie.) I will. I will.
END.
