Making A Stand
Written by Mitchell Hurwitz and Chuck Tatham.
George, Sr.: What kind of lesson?
G.O.B.: J. Walter Weatherman lesson. He’s going to fake a kidnapping and helicopter ride to Colombia.
George, Sr.: He’s going to teach me a lesson using my own scare toy?
G.O.B.: The Weatherman wouldn’t do it. I think Buster turned him.
George, Sr.: Yeah, well, he’ll say yes for me. All right, we’ll go along with his lesson— but we’re going to teach him one of our own. It’s got to be a secret, okay? Between a dad and his... his favorite son.
G.O.B.: Don’t worry, Pop. G.O.B. Bluth doesn’t cave.
George, Sr.: Yeah, you just did for me.
G.O.B.: Well, you asked me to, so I thought...
George, Sr.: Go. Go. Go. It’s fine.
Narrator: And Lindsay and Tobias were back with the arbitrator.
Bob Loblaw: As you know, it is very difficult to establish fault in a divorce, but one indicator is fidelity. Now, my client has not pursued sex outside of this marriage.
Tobias: Nor in it.
Bob Loblaw: I got this one. Can the same be said for you?
Lindsay: Oh, absolutely— I’ve done everything to make this marriage work.
Bob Loblaw: That’s interesting. Can you tell me what your plans are for this evening?
Lindsay: Uh... I have plans with a friend.
Bob Loblaw: A man? What’s his name, please?
Treat: Don’t answer that.
Bob Loblaw: I withdraw the question. Why don’t we stop for the day... so Mrs. Fünke can get to her date with her mysterious Mister... Blah-Blah-Blah. At 8:30, unless you want to sit at the bar.
Narrator: It was the first time someone took Tobias’s side and he wanted to thank him.
Tobias: Bob? Bob? Listen, uh... as much as I hate losing Lindsay and everything, I feel like I’m making a friend in you. So, I was wondering if maybe tonight you just want to, uh... take in a movie, or a shvitz... or just stay in and nest.
Bob Loblaw: Actually, I was going to stay in my office tonight and work on my law blog.
Tobias: Of course— the “Bob Loblaw Law Blog.” Wow. You, sir, are a mouthful!
Narrator: While Tobias was trying to get his mouth around Bob Loblaw, Maeby was showing Mort Meyers a monster of her own.
Mort Meyers: Ah! Oh, it’s terrifying! Who did that for you, Industrial Light and Magic?
Maeby: Kopelson Plastic and Silicon.
Mort Meyers: Did he do Land of the Dead?
Maeby: Yeah, he’s been in Beverly Hills for years.
Mort Meyers: Let’s get our makeup people on it.
Narrator: And George Sr. waited for the fake kidnapping he knew Michael had orchestrated.
Voices: Don’t move!
George, Sr.: Okay, well, let’s do it.
Voices: Get into the box, old man!
George, Sr.: Oh, a blanket, who thought of that? That is very nice.
Voices: Come on. Get in the trunk!
George, Sr.: What about my ankle monitor?
Voices: We have have an ankle monitor... deactivator.
George, Sr.: Oh, good. See? I’ve been meaning to get one of those. I’m not going to resist you guys, because, you know, I don’t want you to beat me.
Narrator: But the mistreated painters were actually looking forward to that part.
George, Sr.: Oh, I forgot my iPod.
Voices: Start the helicopter!
- Yellow Submarine
- The Narrator says the first photo montage “was kind of funny to Yellow Submarine, but who could afford it.” The second photo montage is set to a similar-sounding song, “Yellow Boat.”
Narrator: And, so, Michael, believing himself to be aided by G.O.B., set to work. But, this, too, produced less-than-compelling footage.
Music: / We’re living alone / in a Yellow Boat / A Yellow Boat / A Yellow Boat / We’re making a stand / in a Yellow Boat /
