S.O.B.s
Written by Jim Vallely and Richard Day.
George Michael: Burners are still off and I re-washed all the clothes.
Narrator: And that’s when Michael decided that perhaps Maeby’s tuition didn’t have to go to waste after all. Meanwhile, Lucille went to work soliciting for the Bluth fund-raiser.
Lucille: I mean, we have plenty of money, don’t get me wrong. But we can’t use our personal assets to defend the company.
Narrator: Just then, G.O.B. arrived and decided to have a laugh.
G.O.B.: Your drink, madam. (Chuckles.) Can I get you anything?
Lucille: Get that one out of here.
G.O.B.: As you please.
Narrator: But Lucille had never made eye contact with a waiter.
Waiter #7: Can you drop these off at two?
G.O.B.: Why not. I’m just a waiter.
Narrator: So he kept it up.
G.O.B.: We’re all out of the halibut.
Narrator: The joke was over... but the lunch rush was just beginning.
Waiter #7: Hey, new guy, you want to seat table four?
Narrator: Back at the penthouse however...
Buster: My lunch is long overdue.
Narrator: ...lunch was long overdue.
Buster: I don’t suppose she left anything for me to eat?
George, Sr.: No, just the soup and a half sandwich and a whole sandwich for me.
Michael: Hello. Hey, so what’s going on with the fund-raiser?
- HBO
- The Home Builders Organization has the same acronym as the premium cable channel.
George, Sr.: Well, I don’t think the Home Builders Organization is going to be supporting us.
Michael: Yeah, the HBO’s not going to want us. What do we do now?
- Showtime
- George, Sr. says he thinks it’s “show time”; a reference to the premium cable channel Showtime rumored to be interested in picking up Arrested Development.
George, Sr.: Well, I think it’s show time. I think we have to have a show during dinner.
George, Sr.: Hey, we can have some celebrities in. You know, Oscar winners like Nicole Kidman...
- factoid
- Charlize Theron was an Oscar winner.
- Muffin Man
- John Beard references the children’s song which begins, “Do you know the Muffin Man?”
Michael: I don’t want to just round up a bunch of famous people that have nothing to do with our family as some sort of cheap stunt. What’s that got to do with us?
George, Sr.: Nothing. But you’re going to write a speech about me so they can see how wonderful I am.
Michael: I think we’ve got a better chance at Nicole Kidman.
Michael: Actually, I may have an in with Andy Richter.
George, Sr.: Do you think you can get him? I’m kidding. Of course, not him.
Michael: His brother does teach George Michael at Openings.
George, Sr.: George Michael is going to that new age feel-goodery? I don’t think that’s a good idea. They’re going to poison him against you. Remember what happened when we sent Lindsay to that kind of school? All of a sudden I was the bad guy to her.
Young Lindsay: And you don’t respect Mom and you don’t respect women.
Woman in Negligee: Are you married?
George, Sr.: Damn school.
Narrator: George Sr. did more than just say it. He sent the man a basket of poisoned muffins.
- factoid
- Charlize Theron was an Oscar winner.
- Muffin Man
- John Beard references the children’s song which begins, “Do you know the Muffin Man?”
John Beard: Do you know the Muffin Man? There’s a reward in it if you do. Then— would you like some foam in your coffee? It’s called a cuppakeno and wait till you see what it costs.
George, Sr.: You can say what you want about the Milford Academy— the kids that came out of there, prepared for life.
Buster: Does anyone know how to eat one of these?
Michael: You know, George Michael’s going to be jwst fine, okay? I just want him to know how to express himself.
Buster: It doesn’t do anything.
Narrator: He was actually having trouble expressing himself.
Donnie: Why don’t you tell the group about yourself.
