Episode Transcript
Revision: 1.8
Narrator: Now the story of a wealthy family who lost everything and the one son who had no choice but to keep them all together. It’s... Arrested Development.
Narrator: Michael Bluth had scheduled a meeting with Stan Sitwell, the Bluth Company’s chief competitor.
G.O.B.: Why are we having this meeting at home?
Michael: Well, let him see he’s not the only one who builds solid houses, you know? I think he’ll be pretty impressed, knock on wood.
Narrator: In fact, Michael was meeting at home at the behest of his fugitive father.
G.O.B.: Don’t you find the timing of this meeting a little suspicious? Right before we play his company in softball?
Michael: No, no. Our business is in trouble, and I think he sees an opportunity, so, I figured the guy’s a family man. Why not invite him over, and let him see us in our element?
Maeby: Well, I hope you don’t mean the whole family, ’cause George Michael’s off with Ann.
Michael: Ann? Hmm. That’ll play well with Sitwell. Where’s your son? He’s out with Ann. Who’s Ann? Don’t ask me, I’m just the boy’s father.
G.O.B.: Hey, screw Sitwell. Comes in here telling us how to build our houses, how to raise our kids. Now, we know what we’re doing. We don’t need any help from him.
Maeby: Hey, how do you think I feel? He was the one who said he would help me on this essay for The Old Man and The Sea.
Michael: I’ll help you with that later.
Maeby: Oh, great. Okay. So, you have to read this and then explain it, and this is important: you have to say it in my own words, okay? Smart, but not too smart. Let’s have a four syllable max.
Michael: Do you want to say something, or should I, Tobias?
Tobias: No. I believe in letting children learn from their mistakes, Michael. They make a mistake once, they shant make it twice. Whoa!
Tobias: Don’t worry. It has not fallen into the garage. Knock on wood.
Michael: You gonna want to help me with that?
Tobias: No, I can’t.
Tobias: I think I’ll drive up today and plot my route to the studio.
G.O.B.: I need ice.
Lindsay: I’m glad Sitwell’s coming over. Let him see that we’re doing fine as a family. The only help we need is from each other.
Michael: And apparently, whatever’s in that bottle.
Lindsay: Oh, thanks for reminding me. My Teamocil.
Michael: What a minute. Teamocil? Isn’t that that supplement that you and Tobias were hawking before the FDA shut you down?
Narrator: In the mid ’90s, Tobias formed a folk band to promote a supplement that promised better unity and teamwork.
Tobias: (Singing.) / Teamocil. /
Young Maeby: Teamocil may decrease your sex drive.
Lindsay: (Singing.) / Teamocil. /
Tobias: Good job, buddy.
